Thursday, June 16, 2011
I need to get out
This whole week, the tension at home is unbearable. I am trying so hard to keep both my eyes and my mouth shut tight.
As I don't have a big house, it is near impossible to keep on ignoring those irritating behaviour but I psych myself that I have got to.
My body is slowly being destroyed and if I don't get out of the house, I think my sanity will be too.
D once told me that she admired how some mothers can handle their teens coolly as they are oblivious to it. No matter what nonsense the teens threw at them, they took it as if nothing happened. I wish I can have this will power as well.
Just because he couldn’t get what he wanted, he is set to break and retaliate to all house rules? Do I have to give in to all his demand, abide to his rules whereas for him, he can do whatever he likes and against all house rules that had been set since he was a baby?
Does it meant that he can get away with it because he is a teens?
I just couldn’t figure that out. I remembered when I was in my teens, rules are rules, and it can never be broken. If not, punishment is what I get.
Somehow this doesn’t work anymore. Does it mean that if this doesn’t work, we just give in? How much more I have to do this?
Whatever it is, the tunnel of light is getting dimmer and the hope that I am clinging on so desperately is diminishing slowly.
So I am getting out of the house to get some fresh air! I am meeting a classmate with a young child. Hopefully seeing them can renew my faith in parenthood and rekindle some fond memories of my son when he was a young child.
Since we are going to have tea at her place, I baked Black Sesame chiffon. Let’s hope she enjoys it. I have long wanted to try sesame chiffon as I love sesame.
Note: I might have to lower down the sugar as I find it a little too sweet.
Modified from : Okashi
What you need:
70g cake flour
5 egg yolks (60g)
20g brown sugar
20g black sesame paste
40g canola oil
15g black sesame seeds (as I wasn't sure whether I like that bite)
5 egg white
90g castor sugar
10g corn flour
Preheat oven to 160 degree. Prepare a 20cm chiffon tin.
Whisk egg yolks, brown sugar and black sesame paste. Add in water and canola oil and blend them well. Add in flour and whisk till it is thick. Fold in the black sesame seeds. Set aside.
Mix sugar and cornflour together.
Beat egg white till foamy. Add sugar mixture into two batches. Beat egg white till stiff.
Add one third of egg white to the yolk batter. Blend well.
Fold in gently the remaining egg white to batter.
Pour into mould and bake for 40min - 1 hour.
Remove and cool upside up.
Unmould when the cake is completely cool.
Posted by Edith at 1:03 PM